Q: Help! I’m a drunk Facebook-er! Anytime I get the least bit tipsy at a bar, out comes the iPhone and the Facebook app, where I proceed to make incoherent comments on people’s walls/statuses or friend people I did NOT intended on friend-ing. Help me change my beligerent FB ways! –Anonymous
A: Dear Anonydrunk,
I can’t believe youg ket yourself go on facbeook whiel you are inebriateddddddddddddddd ahhh you are so stupid., soeriosly htough you need to stop doing ttha bcuz you rae gonna get in troubbbbbbbble on the real. One tiem I drunk fb’d some1, not just some1 but my EX and u wouldn’t believ it but I tried to git back 2gether wit him and let me tell u it did nottttttt owoorrrrrrk. I woke up the nxt day and felt like carp and u better blieve I was still sleepin alone. U need to seriousluy take care when u go on fb and make sure ur nto doing anyting stupid . ahh it’s the worsttttt!!!1 I am freaking iut jstu thinkng of all the dum sht I have seaid to people on there like another timr I was drinking strait whiscky and I found myself sexting all these peeps ive never evn met b4 it wsa like too much too fast and let me tell u I fo sho woke up alone the next day. U just need to look at urself and say “what is my problem” and just accept that u are an alcohilic and getyourslf some tender lovin care in the arms of a rehab centr. Just make sure thir policy is :NOOOOOoooO PHONES ALLOWED.
P.S. I no we don’t know each other but u sound cute so if u wana cme over l8er just holla @ my wall