FACEBOOK DRAMA!

About

Got a mess of trouble on Facebook?
The Laurens have the answers! Email us at fixmyfacebook@gmail.com or post an anonymous question directly to our Formspring.
We are here to help.

The Laurens are Lauren Lapkus and Lauren Ashley Smith. Please feel free to contact us! fixmyfacebook@gmail.com

**Disclaimer: Every question was submitted by an actual person. The Laurens are here to solve your problems, not create new ones.**

Follow us on Twitter!

Following

2 notes October 19, 2009 11 49 AM

A: Previously when tagging photos, the box would have a list of my friends to pick from and when typing a name it would find them in my list. Now it does not find anyone in my list - all names end up being ‘unlinked’ to any accounts… Is there a setting I could have changed here? -Ralph

A: Thank you for choosing Facebook Drama technical support. The next representative will be available to assist you shortly.

(long wait)

Hello, Ralph, thank you for patiently waiting, ok. My name is Lauren and I will be assisting you today. Please be advised that this post may be monitored for quality assurance purposes. Very well, Miss Ralph, I see here that you are having trouble, please, with tagging friends and acquaintances in photos. Is that correct? Yes. Mr. Ralph, ma’am, I can tell you that you are not the only person experiencing this difficulty with the Facebook. May I put you on hold, please? Thank you.

(elevator music for about 17 minutes)

Are you still there? Thank you for holding, miss. As I was explaining previously, humans like Victoria Garbutt-Shergold and Melissa Fioere Fleckenstein have reported the same difficulties that you have reported, ok. Take comfort in the fact that this change in service is no fault of yours. The absence of friends in your list when attempting to tag photos is the result of a Facebook glitch specific to your Windows operating system and at the moment, the only solution to your problem is to wait until Facebook sorts it out. Unfortunately at this time I do not have any further knowledge of this product other than that I can offer you absolutely no assistance. Also, here it is 5am sunrise time and it is the hour for me to go home to my family, miss. Is there anything else I can assist you with this morning… I mean this afternoon or whatever time it is where you are? Very well. On a scale of one to six, how would you rate the effectiveness of this call? Very well ok. Thank you for calling Facebook Drama tech support, Mrs. Ralph, and goodbye to you. Ok.

Love,

Lauren

--Tagged under: facebook--

--Tagged under: advice--

--Tagged under: tech support--

--Tagged under: photos--

--Tagged under: friends--

Comments (View)

2 notes September 6, 2009 12 00 PM

Q: Lauren! How do I tell my friends that it’s not necessary to tag me in my own pictures?! Why do they have to be such fucking assholes all the time?! I didn’t mean to swear. -Jessica Joy

A: Greetings, Jessica Joy! I have to say, for such a happy sounding name, you don’t sound too joyful. That’s probably because your friends suck. JK… But they do. JK again, but not! You know that old saying ‘you can pick your friends and you can pick your nose, but you can’t pick your friend’s nose?’ Well, this right here is a case of you needing to pick new friends. Something tells me that this little tagging situation isn’t the only thing bugging you about your GOF (group of friends). Let me guess—they pop their collars don’t they? They refer to each other as ‘Broseph’ in public too, right? These are all signs that they are douche bags, JJ. But you know what? Being 100% Summer’s Eve doesn’t give them the right to breech the code of FB ettiquette. Here’s what you need to do: sit those DBs down between keg stands and tell them that if they do not stop tagging you in your own GDMF pictures, you will be forced confiscate their Axe body spray, hair gel, and Ed Hardy trucker hats. If the potential loss of everything they believe in isn’t enough to make them stop, you can post a passive aggressive Facebook status saying ‘if I wanted to be tagged in my own pics, I would do it myself!’ or put that message in the info section of every photo album you post. Those poor douches don’t know any better so it’s best to be direct and just hope they get the message. Seriously though, find some new friends.

Love,

Lauren

--Tagged under: facebook--

--Tagged under: advice--

--Tagged under: douche--

--Tagged under: friends--

--Tagged under: photos--

--Tagged under: tags--

Comments (View)

2 notes August 21, 2009 12 14 PM

Q: We used to have the same issue on MySpace, but it has definitely carried over to Facebook. I live with my girlfriend and sometimes we go on FB together, and I see my female friends posting all sorts of underwear shots labeled “My New Modeling Shoot!” or slutty swimsuit shots. How do I avoid the awkwardness of seeing that with my girlfriend there? Should I de-friend them even though these “models” are technically friends? How do I make sure I don’t see more than your face on facebook?! Especially since FB puts all the new pics and stuff on our homepages. -Anonymous

A: Wow, ok. First, Anon, tell your girlfriend ‘hi’ for me because I know her controlling eyes are reading every word on this page. I DON’T WANT YOUR MAN, girl, so back down!

Is she gone? Ok, now that we’re alone, Anonymous, I suggest you take a moment to think for yourself—do you want to unfriend these girls? I’m guessing the answer is ‘no.’ You and I both know that allowing a little FB T&A to brighten your day is not a crime. But I understand—it’s awkward to sample the goods while your girlfriend is breathing down your neck. Lucky for you, there is a way for you to keep abreast (heyoo!) of your friends’ modeling endeavors without your GF getting all up in your biz. All you have to do is hide the foxy ladies from your mini feed, which you can do by clicking to the right of their next update on your main page. That way none of their super sexy swimsuit shoots will show up in your feed, but you’ll still be able to sneak a peek the next time your GF steals away to take her medication. Enjoy the photos and good luck getting out of the house, like, ever.

Love,

Lauren

--Tagged under: facebook--

--Tagged under: girlfriend--

--Tagged under: photos--

--Tagged under: swimsuits--

Comments (View)

About

Meta

Following